Comments on: Editing and Improving Work

By: Regan

Regan — Sat, 04 Mar 2017 11:58:25 +0000

The door slammed behind me! I was alone in the room, or was I? The room was pitch black and there was a huge amount of dust in the steamy air. It was freezing cold too, like there was a ghost
in the room. I crept towards the window, hoping to find that I could let some light in. I found them boarded up, meaning I would have to stay in the darkness. “Oh no,” I muttered to myself…

By: Daniel Lawton

Daniel Lawton — Tue, 28 Feb 2017 16:13:27 +0000

The door slammed behind me! I was alone in the room. Or was I? The room was quite dark and there was a lot of dust in the air. It was cold too, like there was a ghost in the room. I walked towards the window hoping to find that I could let some light in. I found them boarded up, meaning I would have to stay in the darkness. “Oh no!”, I muttered to myself.

By: Lucy

Lucy — Thu, 23 Feb 2017 14:09:54 +0000

The door slammed behind me, I was all alone in the room, or was I? The room was dark and gloomy and there was a lot of mouldy dust in the air. It was cold, like there was a ghost in the room. I walked towards the window to see if any light was gleaming through. I found them boarded up like an abandoned house, meaning I would have to stay in the spooky darkness. “Oh no!” I screamed to myself.

By: Sally Birmingham

Sally Birmingham — Wed, 15 Feb 2017 20:34:45 +0000

I was in the room all alone,or was I. The door slammed behind me! The room was quite dark and there was a lot of dust in the air. It was incredibly cold too, it was like there was a ghost in the room. I walked towards the window hoping to find thats some light could get in ,but I found them all boarded up so I could not see through them at all so that meant I would have to stay in the darkness “Oh no,” I whispered to myself! Then all of a sudden, the door opened wider and wider until I could see a faint shadow behind the opening door, and then the thing walked in ,it was Meg, my dog! Then I burst into happy tears.
THE END!

By: Sam Fitzpatrick

Sam Fitzpatrick — Wed, 15 Feb 2017 17:38:58 +0000

The door slammed behind me, I was alone in a room, or was I? The room was quite dark and there was a lot of dust in the air. It was cold too, like there was a ghost in the room. I walked towards the window hoping to find that I could let some light in. I found them boarded up, meaning I would have to stay in the darkness. “Oh no,” I muttered to myself.